There is a plague in our society, an unknown fiend that has wormed its way into the minds of the citizens. It lies in wait, lurking in the quietest corner of the brain. But do not be deceived by its seemingly unimportant presence, for when you least expect it, it will leap upon your unwary cerebrum and take hold. It is only appeased after sucking your mind dry.

It is boredom. Take note, my friends, for if you have not already succumbed to its lies, then it will surely arrive soon. Guard your mind well; I recommend noisemakers, iPods, and a healthy stash of Baby Ruth candy bars, as they are boredom’s only known natural enemy.

Some psychologists may tell you that boredom is beneficial, but do not listen to these wrongdoers! They only seek to trick you. Guard yourself against deceit; train yourself for appropriate action when boredom comes knocking.

Then again…if not for boredom, would I have written this?