“Check out that sign- ‘Find out why God rocks’- God does rock, and my hair looks awesome!”

“Note the look of total disbelief on my face. See it? I promise you, it’s there.”

“Well it does! If I had been that blonde chick in Hairspray, Zac Effron definitely would have picked me.”

“Random much? Or more so- conceited much?”

“We’re both hot, and pretty people date pretty people, that’s just how it works.”

“There’s something wrong with you.”

“Zac Effron’s so hot! He’s on my list of things to do- er- people to date.”

“Random Zac Effron fact- he’s Jewish.”

“Ew. Now he’s off the list.”

“Wait- what? I just had to endure several minutes of Effronophiling, and you give me that?! What does him being Jewish have to do with anything?!”

“I’m Muslim.”

“You’re white!”

“You don’t have to be from the Middle East to be Muslim.”

“Yeah you do.”

“All right, fine, how about this- I’m gay.”

“That’s a little weird for me. Can I start calling you Butch?”