Priced to Move

by THX 0477

Screams rang out like echoes to the gunshot in the crowded store. The man wheeled around, the gun swinging in a dangerous arc that left no one feeling safe. But David felt new life flow through his veins. The time had come; the moment was now.

Others ducked and cowered before the greasy madman, but David eyed him squarely. His peripheral vision took in the surroundings, confirming what he had casually seen before. Slow, he inched to one side, bringing himself behind a cardboard cut-out of the latest cartoon character to be thrust upon the impressionable minds of the nation’s youth.

“Who’s ignoring me now!” the man menaced, spittle flying freely from his mouth. “Come on! Just try to ignore me! You’re cattle, stupid filthy cattle!”

Once the man turned the other way, David yelled, “I’m not ignoring you!” And for once in his quiet life, David sprang into action.

The man turned, bringing the gun to bear, but he was met with a heavy glass vase (on sale $15.99) flung hard and fast into his dirty face.

Comments

Average Reader Rating: 5.0 stars out of 5

  1. Priced to Move

    Melia's Buddy Icon Melia

    Posted 7 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    It’s the addition of the price of the vase that really makes this story for me :) Loved that. Geat sequel!

  2. Priced to Move

    paper flowers' Buddy Icon paper flowers

    Posted 7 months ago

    I really liked this sequel. very impressive. And I agree with Melia, adding the price of the vase made me smile :-)
    LoA

  3. Priced to Move

    SKermitgorf's Buddy Icon SKermitgorf

    Posted 7 months ago

    So clever, action packed and the humor throughout, is trademark Thx0477, the latest cartoon character line and the vase.. priceless.. i mean (on sale $15.99)
    LoA

  4. Priced to Move

    Blossom Ruoqen's Buddy Icon Blossom Ruoqen

    Posted 7 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Hooray new cartoon character!!! lol
    lovely descriptions, and wording is detailed but not dragged out. Huzzah! (cheers follow)

  5. Priced to Move

    Adam Croft's Buddy Icon Adam Croft

    Posted 7 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Excellent! Wow, one of my pieces has been sequeled :-))

    I love the fact that it was kept in a similar style of writing to mine as well :-)

  6. Priced to Move

    Geek Mythology's Buddy Icon Geek Mythology

    Posted 7 months ago

    How many times have I wanted to do that to annoying customers . . . . :D

  7. Priced to Move

    Music-Hearted's Buddy Icon Music-Hearted

    Posted 7 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    “And for once in his quiet life…”

    That line is brilliant. Definitely hit home for me, great job.
    LoA

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