“I can’t do this!”

“You have to. It’s your job.“

“But George, I can’t wrap the poor penguin!”

“Sue. It’s stuffed.“

“I know it is. I just fed it.”

“Why?!”

“Because I couldn’t let it go hungry all alone in the big box until Christmas Eve.”

“No, no, no-”

“What? You wanted me to starve the poor thing??”

“Sue. It can’t eat.”

“Well, it did.”

“Sue! It’s not real!”

“Of course it is, silly. It eats, and breathes, and waddles..”

“For Goodness Sakes Sue, it is a stuffed animal. It can’t eat, or breathe, or waddle.”

“I believe you very mistaken, George. Come look.”

“Oh my Lanta. They sent us a real penguin this year… This can’t be good.”

“Now you see why I can’t wrap it? It’d be animal abuse.”

“Special delivery! Ma’am, here’s the toys you ordered.“

“Oh, uhm. Thank you.”

“There Sue. There’s your penguin. Now go wrap it.”

“Yes, Sir. Uhm, Sir? What should I do with the real penguin.”

“Tae it to the zoo.”