Wow, this is good, very real sounding. I really like it. Five stars!

I love it, especially the last line. Very well done.

awww..that is so sad… and so good!!!

Ohh…wonderfully rhythmic and beautiful. I especially LOVE the way the grass is dead and the clouds come when your character collapses. Amazing imagery.
LoA

Had to sequel, I loved it so much. Once I get thinking on a metaphor.
LoA

This was just… amazing. So real… excellent job.
LoA

Wow… this is really good. I know that feeling.

i love the repeatitiveness of “one foot, other foot”. that made it very poetic.