Creepy stuff – in the good way, though. I can’t imagine what it’d be like to have a job like that. I especially liked the beginning, and the description about the dust. An abandoned town can be scarier than any multi – tentacled monster, in many ways. For one, the silence, like you mentioned. I gotta quit rambling. Great job anyways. : )

This is really good stuff… a great beginning. i wanna read more!! More more more!!

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There now you have incentive too! :)

wow, this is really good! hmm reminds me of… oh what’s the disease i learned about in bio last yr… that causes you to bleed out everywhere or something… gah! it woulda helped had i paid attention last year… ok nvm, good story =)

Ebola, or any of the hemmoragic fever viruses, will do that. But Ebola is the famous one.

I liked the imagery and tone of the piece, but I did find the profusion of adjectives to be a little heavy-handed. At the end of the first paragraph and beginning of the second, there is a sequence of four key nouns (boots, man, hand, mattress), each of which sports an adjective. I’m not saying adjectives are evil or anything, just that too many of them really interrupts the flow of the work.

Worse than a ghost town…a corpse town. Really good combo of the sci-fi/contagion sort of story with the Western motif. And if cloister doesn’t like the way you use adjectives, I hope he/she doesn’t read my stuff.

Cloister – I knew there was something a little funky. I’m not sure whether I should change it or not…or, more accurately, whether I want to. Yay laziness!

Inspiring.. literally

Some nuclear incident? intriguing plot.