so now im pissed. no, not pissed, superpissed, cause even wen im pissed, i refrain from violence. but im superpissed and i cant even think straight. so wen go through the rest of the cheer and i cant even contain how mad i am. so we start the cheer the third time, and before he can run into me again, i take my elbow, and with ALL OF MY STRENGTH (and im pretty strong, i play softball), i ram my elbow into his left forearm.

he grabs his arm and looks at me just like “wow” and kind of disgusted. i was so pissed before and all of a sudden i feel sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo guilty. i hate hurting people, hate watching people get hurt, even hate watching people almost get hurt. i feel almost sick. and afraid that he will spread the word that im a freak and really scary and dont talk to me or else ill hurt u. im very self-concious, so im really freaking out.

i move to the riser above the one i was on, next to a guy im friends with