“Dad, were you ever scared of losing someone you loved or things not working out? Is that one of the reasons you never got married?” I asked. “No, Essie. We’ve talked about this,” he said, somewhat irritably. But we really hadn’t. Then, he took a deep breath. “Look, when you get older, love becomes more complicated, especially for someone like me. But I guess you have to be willing to lose in order to gain,” he admitted. “But I remember the minute I first laid my eyes on you, I loved you. And so I fought for you. Believe me, the adoption process can be one big headache, and some days I wondered if there was really any point in trying at all, since I thought I would never be good enough.I would never be lucky enough. But I was, because I found you,” he explained. “So,to answer your question,yes,I have been afraid of losing and even loving. But you know how I can’t explain it any more than that. I just can’t Essie.As long as there’s someone on this earth that I can love forever, then I’ll survive somehow.”