“Please tell me again, Sir, how you lost your wallet?”
“So I was headin’ out for lunch. See, it was noon-time, and I was hungry-like. I had a hankerin’ for pizza. I’m walking down King street, and all of a sudden there’s no traffic. Now, this is King, you know, the main street here. Seeing no traffic, heck, it’s like it was the Doldrums, or sumthin’. I realize, Self, you aren’t going to get this chance often, so I goes. I’m jaywalking across King, and it feels so free. Like a bird or somethin’. I get across, just as traffic is pickin’ up again. It was strange. A cavalcade of Hummers were coming. I’m looking down the street noticing this, and some kleptomaniac freak walks into me. I know it was him, ‘cause when I got to the pizza shop, my wallet was gone.”
“Thanks Sir. We got your description. We’ll look into it.”