Set Sentence Challenge ~It's my 210th ficlet!~

Okay, I hit 200 like two days ago… and this is 210. I was gonna give my challenge a miss, but I changed my mind. Soooo…. let’s do this. You MUST HAVE at least one of the following in your ficlet:

1) I knew it was a bad idea when he wanted to paint my portrait with mayonnaise.
2) It’s not like anyone’s ever gonna know what we did, I mean, who’d suspect us?
3) Don’t mess with me. I’m a demon.

1) a pet monkey named Sean
2) an ex-boyfriend/girlfriend named Madison

1) If he ever touches me again, I’ll shoot him.
2) At least life went on for them.
3) But nobody knew why.

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